The Twelve Gods of Crogus
Scrimmy Bingus and the Crungy Spingus takes place in a universe run by twelve canonical "Ungi", or "gods."
| Ungus (God) | Element | Month | Form |
|---|---|---|---|
| Bingus | October | Swiss cheese | |
| Chungus | Creation | November | Nonbinary |
| Glungus | Death | December | Bear (Literally and figuratively) |
| Hoopie Bing Bong | Chaos | January | A human skin cell |
| Brumport Tungus | Furries and Virtue | February | |
| Chungy Brumpy | [redacted] | March | A twelve-headed rat |
| Hungus Bungus | Fists | April | The letter E. |
| Tumbley Bumbly | Bees | May | Femme Lesbian |
| Hunky Brumpo | War | June | Sports Lesbian |
| Ungie Bungie | July | The beach 20 miles north of the northern border of [redacted] | |
| Shrimpy Cringus | Local Pharmaceuticals | August | Twink |
| Hungort Chungort | Breaking the fourth wall. | September | The thing right behind you. |
Myths of Creation
The world of Crogus is Chungus' 47th attempt at creating a planet that didn't bore them. Previous attempts were too volatile, and exploded to create the stars, the sun, and Newark, New Jersey. He abandoned each previous attempt because he like, needed some inspiration, man. Finally, in his efforts to destroy Newark, he accidentally formed Bingus, Ungus of water.
An infinite ocean surrounded Bingus and Chungus, covering Newark and all of its evils. Bingus remarked to Chungus that if she were not created, Newark's destructive forces would have spread to infect every star in the universe. As the two spoke, the ocean surrounding them began vibrate. Chungus swam down to see what was wrong, and found Newark ruptured, with a newly-formed Glungus climbing out of the cracks.
Glungus and Chungus did battle beneath the sea, as Glungus struggled to swim above the water and destroy Chungus's shitty attempt at a universe because he's just a dick like that. Finally, Chungus trapped Glungus by hardening the water above Newark, creating the land of Crogus.
The nine other canonical gods are the children of Chungus and Bingus, who are not assigned genders in the established mythos. Each of the nine special factions who inhabit Crogus correspond to the Lesser Ungus who created them.
Myths of Death and the Afterlife
Not much is known about the Crogan afterlife, though there are myths surrounding the exploits of Glungus. The most prominent of these is a tale in which Hoopie Bing Bong (the Ungus of chaos) is sent down to Newark by Chungus as punishment for Hoopie's creation of internet trolling. Hoopie retaliates by turning Glungus into a bear and bringing a second bear with her down to Newark. When she came back up, she returned with only one bear, which she released into the overworld. None of the Ungi could tell whether the bear still in Newark was Glungus or not, and frankly, none of them really cared.
Most versions of the myth state that the bear brought to the overworld was Glungus, and that death was created when he was released. Competing versions, however, posit that Glungus is still trapped, and that the dying just need to pull themselves up by their bootstraps.
Non-Canonical Gods
- Bear